Sleepless Nights

So the nurses had told me when to take a HPT based on the day of our procedure. That day seemed like 14 years but it finally came and I was too chicken to do anything! I convinced myself it was too early and I wasn't ready to see one line yet again. After 2 or 3 restless nights and praying to God for guts and strength to do it, I did. One morning I couldn't take it anymore so March 4th, 2010 I WATCHED those two lines appear instantly...no 2 minute wait period for me! hehe ( I guess we know why now.) Ryan had already gone to work for the day so it was me and the Snug. I cried, prayed, laughed, cried, praised the Lord for an hour or two at home before I could get myself together to go into work. I called the Doc and they had me come right on in for a blood test. I decided not to get too excited until they called with the results...after all, I had alot of hormones from the meds floating around in my body...maybe it was a false positive? No siree, they called back pretty quickly very excited (I had the best nurses at our Fertility Clinic...they really were rooting for us so it was special for one of my favorites to call me with the results). My HCG level was 494. Sounded good to me until I got home and looked in my journal from my first pregnancy. The first time, 2 days LATER, my number was 221. Hmmmm my number is almost doubled...earlier in the pregnancy than last time. This is the first time multiples came to mind but as silly as it sounds I immediately dismissed that and convinced myself this was just a healthy pregnancy. My numbers should have been this the first time. Ha! What I know now!

Quick side note: that day had been especially tough...a young girl in our Youth Group at church had become suddenly very ill and was facing very real, scary consequences if she did not get a liver transplant immediately. Ryan had been at the hospital all afternoon/evening so I still hadn't had a chance to talk to him! He came home, plopped on the couch and said "oh, what an emotionally exhausting day!" I just chuckled in my mind...just wait buddy! I told him to close his eyes that I picked up something for him that day to make him feel better. :) It did :) We spent alot of time that night praising the Lord, cautiously optimistic, and trying to establish our foothold against the enemy and the doubts he tenaciously started sending our way.

I went back to the Doc two days later for another blood test. My HCG was now 1,779.6 (my first pregnancy 48-hr-later test was 580). Yea! I said to myself, a healthy growing baby.hahaha.