Four Months

I'm a little late in this post, but my babies turned 4 months old about a week ago! I am still not used to how much can change in their little personalities, appearance, and preferences in just one month. We are having sooo much fun interacting with them now and picking apart their differences that we observe. It is so fun to see how similar, yet different God has formed their little personalities. Here is a picture of my little boy and big girl...keep reading and you'll see why :)




First, to set the scene, their 4 month appointment was an absolute circus. Ryan had a big project come up at work and could not go with me to their appointment. In the short notice, my Dad was able to "drop in" and help me take them for the appointment. While working with the Ped with Jenna, Caden all of a sudden goes NUTS! My Dad can't get him to calm down for anything...I can't hear anything the Ped is saying and Dad is getting tickled at himself. Then, I share with the Ped about Jenna's head-to-the-side preference and he starts investigating. He goes to mess with her head and neck and she goes BONKERS...did not like that at all! So now both of them are wailing at the top of their lungs in this tiny room that felt like a closet. :) The Ped walks out to get their shots ready and my dad and I cant' stop laughing. Jenna had cried and worked herself up so much so that she threw up all over Dad (who had to go back to work after this mind you :) ) Anyway, the crying ramped up even more when they got their shots. By the time we left, Dad was covered in spit up and I was sweating profusely from laughing so hard. Ahhhh good times. Dad magically already knew his schedule for their 6 month appt and informed me he was busy that day :) haha jk. Here is their 4 month bandaid pic :)




The Stats: At their 4 month appointment the inevitable happened: Jenna passed her brother in weight! She also grew more inches overall and is now equal with brother. Caden had previously always weighed more (up to half a pound at one point) and was always about a half inch taller. Well, Jenna Girl said move out of the way! Jenna (12lb 9oz) is now 4 ounces more than Caden (12lb 5oz). They are both 23.25 inches tall now which means Jenna Girl grew almost 2 inches in one month!



and here is our attempt to straighten Jenna's head with rolled up blankets in her bouncy seat:




The Doctor came in and asked me if Caden was more active then Jenna. "Ummmmmm YES!" I said. The Doc said he thought this was the reason why Caden's growth chart took a dip. Caden is burning more calories and has a higher metabolism, so the Doctor recommended we start Caden with cereal! I was hoping to get to 6 months before starting this, but we need to get more calories in my active little boy! Soooo we brought down the high chair from the attic and got Caden ready to start this "yummy" (ick) cereal. The first experience? = epic fail. He was waaaay too tired that night and just wanted to be in bed.

We have taken our time getting used to it and increasing its consistency. He is a pro now and can swallow most of what we give him! Such a Big Boy!




We need to go get Jenna a chair so she can sit with with the family at breakfast and dinner time. Bless her heart, she is usually in the pack n play or in a bumbo seat on the floor :( She is doing just fine in her growth chart (obviously) so the Ped said we could just keep her on Breastmilk exclusively until 6 months. Yea!

Schedule: I thought the introduction of cereal was going to massively mess up our fabulous schedule we had created. For a few days it did throw a kink in things since it took so much extra time to get both babies downstairs, settled, fed, cleaned up, burped, bring both babies back upstairs to change before putting them back down for a nap. There is little play time in the morning since they are tired and ready to be back in bed by the time single me can get all of that done (after nursing them first!) They have adapted beautifully and we are now back on a solid schedule...so much so that we can tell you exactly when they will get tired, aaaand, for about a week now, I can even tell you when Jenna will have her daily blow out :)

Sleeping: They are soooooo great. I'm so thankful for good sleepers and pray every night that the Lord allows us to continue training them to be good sleepers through all of the growth spurts and changes we have coming our way as they grow older. Jenna sleeps the last 1.5 hour of each cycle and Caden sleeps the last 1 hour. They go down so easy for nap time now that we have established our schedule and learned their sleep cue. Jenna is clear as a bell, she will be happy and cooing then all of a sudden...fussy and rubs her eyes. That's your que! Go put her down and she is out. Caden needs to get out about 30 minutes extra activity, then he gets fussy and goes down instantly. We put them down after the 9pm feeding and they sleep, without incident until about 5 am. At this point, it just takes us going in there and putting Jenna back on her side and putting the paci back in Caden's mouth and they sleep until 8 am! Granted, this is not every night...Jenna wakes us up more consistently than Caden...but each time, we are up with her for 60 seconds or less, getting her situated or covered back up or back on her side, then she is fast asleep again. I know we should sleep train her a bit better to teach herself to soothe and go back to sleep...but for the overall hours of sleep they give us, I'll sacrifice 60 seconds 2 or 3 times a night! They are still in the same crib, although I fear the day we split them up is coming soon....Jenna in particular is a traveler when she sleeps. I frequently find her like this when I go in after nap time...maybe she is getting back at Caden for all of the kicks in the womb?




Jenna has jumped on the smile train and is now giving the most adorable smiles. Caden smiles with his entire face. Jenna smiles with her eyes and opens her mouth wide open to smile. Precious! Also, no more crazy Jenna from 8-11 ! Hallelujah! She has really come into a content personality all day and will sit and coo and observe things around her. Hallelujah!

Another HUGE development is that the twins recognize each other now! One night, we were holding them after dinner and they seemed to lock in and focus on each other. They started smiling and cooing at each other...back and forth. Me and Ryan were like kids we were so excited! We will work on getting it captured on video soon. It will melt your heart.

Clothing: We are finally in 1-2 diapers and will make the switch to Size 2 when we run out of 1-2's. Also, this month I just now packed up their Newborn pants. The length was still perfect, but the waist got a bit tight haha. They are in 0-3 month separates and 3 month oneises / footies. Some 3- 6 month onesies fit them.

Activities: We still enjoy our bumbo seats where Jenna has become noticeably stronger. They hate tummy time :( We are going for walks just about any day it is near 60 or higher. We dusted off the jogging stroller and put them in it...they did great! Now if Mama can get in shape to push them while actually jogging, we will be in business! Jenna is getting stronger and stronger! Go Jenna!




Here they are opening their Valentine Cards and enjoying their balloons from Gigi and Papa T:



As I mentioned, we have really started to notice their differences in personalities. I came up with a chart so we could see them side by side. It will be fun to share this with them when they are older to show them how God formed them individually and with unique differences.

Twins 101 - Activities for Two

I get alot of questions asking what I do with the twins while they are awake.

The answer is: anything I can think of that involves both of them!

I'm taking advantage of the time they are not mobile, so I put them together, in the same room, doing the same thing when I can. :) I always try to rotate their awake time to do different things...i.e. on the floor under the activity mat, in their bouncy seat, in their crib with the mobile on, on the floor stretching and kicking, bumbo seats, tummy time etc... I think soon we will introduce the exer-saucer...Caden is ready to jump! Now that it is getting warmer, we have started going on walks more and more around the neighborhood and the Lake!

Now, this doesn't mean that they both enjoy that particular activity at the time, so sometimes they get split up and the fussy baby goes to the next thing, but for the most part they are content and do well until we close that cycle with their nap. I try to stay involved with them and play, talk, coo and interact with them while they are awake. Then I run around like crazy while they are napping trying to get stuff done! :)


Here is what we do when we are sick and cranky:

Sick Day Activity from Casey Little on Vimeo.

Here we are enjoying our bumbo seats: (this was taken the first time we tried them out...about month ago)

Bumbo Seats from Casey Little on Vimeo.

and our bouncy seats:

and here we are enjoying our playmat. I think I have two future runners like Mommy and Daddy the way they are moving those legs! Also....I captured the most adorable moments of them holding each others hand! Yes, it was inadvertent, but the most precious thing EVER!

Holding Hands from Casey Little on Vimeo.

and here is our newest activity now that we have discovered BALLOONS! This is cute. Enjoy:

Valentine's Day Balloons from Casey Little on Vimeo.

A Year Ago Today...

I've been thinking about today alot lately....Feb 17th. A year ago today is when we went into the Fertility Clinic for our IUI procedure. I was desperately clinging to a thin string of hope that this might work. If it didn't, we were at the end of our treatment road for the time being. Earlier this week, me and Ryan were remembering back to last Valentine's Day...Ryan having to give me all of my shots and me having to take a zillion pills to prepare my body for the procedure on the 17th. I've also been thinking about how a year ago, I would have hated reading this blog. One of the things (oh there were many!) that I struggled with God about was not that He hadn't given us a child yet, but that He allowed seemingly everyone else in my personal universe to be blessed with children! Each announcement sent me whirling into a selfish depression. God gave me many "opportunities" to turn my eyes away from myself and rejoice in His blessings and creations in others, but I in turn allowed the Devil to steal my joy and listened to his lies. So many people tried to encourage me and share their story of God's faithfulness in their trial, but my response was always shallow and hardened: "They have their baby now", I would tell Ryan. Somehow in my deceived brain, that made them incompatible to understand what I felt since they had been granted what they asked for now....I didn't have a guarantee that we would have children, I didn't know if a little baby was in God's plan for us. And even if they did go through some of the same treatments and struggles, some of them had never lost a baby to understand that compounded hurt. I even fought with Ryan because I didn't give him credit for understanding what I was feeling and going through. Ugh, what horrible, lonely place to be. The last thing I would have enjoyed doing is reading someones blog of their love and every day joy for their baby.

So that brings me to this: I've kept this blog public so far hoping that God has placed it in someones life that resembles what mine did not too long ago. I followed several blogs of women who were struggling with infertility (all of whom ironically got pregnant before we did...thus another dagger in the heart with each "announcement." How selfish! I should have been thrilled for them since many of them had been struggling much longer than we had. Instead I thought to myself "even the infertile women are getting pregnant around me!") I'm so thankful for God's mercies...new every morning!

So I won't start rattling out cliche's that everyone has heard before, I'll just say a few things:

1- I desperately clung to Psalm 27:13-14: " I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

2- I kept this verse on a note card in my purse at all times: Jeremiah 32:40a- "I will make an everlasting covenant with them that I will not turn away from them, to do them good..."

3- Healing began when I realized that God understood every aspect of feeling I had. God hurt and grieved with me. Isa 63:9 says " in all their affliction He was afflicted...in His love and in His pity He redeemed them; He bore them and carried them."

4- I read an eye opening chapter in a book talking about John 11 and the story of Jesus and Lazarus. John 11:44 says " Take off the grave clothes...and let him go." The writer talked about grave clothes and how different they look on all of us. Here is what I kept on my note card to pull me out of the dark days: My grave clothes keep me from joy, peace, happiness and total release from the pain/disappointment/frustration / {insert your problem here}. Don't become accustomed to the bindings and settle for less than God has intended for me. I want everything God has for me! Galatians 5:1 - "It is for freedom that Christ has set us FREE. Stand firm and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slaves."

A year ago today was quite the uncomfortable day physically, yet represented a healing I never comprehended. Our two little miracles were forming and God was healing my brokenness, my selfishness, my anger, my marriage, my joy...my everything really! I'm so oober thankful for the difference a year can make, I'm thankful Gods ways are higher than mine, I'm thankful that His plan DID include children for us, I'm thankful He blessed us even though I miserably failed my test in trusting Him, I'm thankful for a faithful husband and I'm so thankful for Caden and Jenna.

I don't know how I would have responded if God's plan did not include children. I imagine how I hope I would have responded, but given my 2 year test, I don't have much confidence in my imaginary response. :( God has been gracious so I will take the opportunities He gives us to point others toward Him and glorify His work in our lives. So if your struggling with anything, infertility specifically, then I can tell you that from this side, I understand His timing is perfect, His plan is better than you can dream and He understands how you feel. No, of course I did not fully believe this all the time when I was going through our trial, but mark us down as one more example of God's sovereignty and grace.

Last, anything I'm trying to say is summed up beautifully in a song by Josh Wilson. Its called "Before the Morning." It is a wonderful way to remember the Lords promise "sorrow may last for the night, but JOY comes in the morning!"

Do you wonder why you have to,
feel the things that hurt you,
if there's a God who loves you,
where is He now?

Maybe, there are things you can't see
and all those things are happening
to bring a better ending
some day, some how, you'll see, you'll see

Chorus:
Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming

so hold on, you got to wait for the light
press on, just fight the good fight
because the pain you've been feeling,
it's just the dark before the morning

My friend, you know how this all ends
and you know where you're going,
you just don't know how you get there
so just say a prayer.
and hold on, cause there's good who love God,
life is not a snapshot, it might take a little time,
but you'll see the bigger picture

Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming

so hold on, you got to wait for the light
press on, just fight the good fight
because the pain you've been feeling,
it's just the dark before the morning
yeah, yeah,
before the morning,
yeah, yeah

Once you feel the way of glory,
all your pain will fade to memory
once you feel the way of glory,
all your pain will fade to memory
memory, memory, yeah

Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming

Would dare you, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming

We are living our "morning" as the song says and can speak to the power of God's grace. In the car leaving the clinic the morning we found out there were TWO babies growing inside, I looked to Ryan and told him I was already beginning to forget the pain from the past 2 years. Whatever your trial is today..."all your pain will fade to memory."


Psalm 126:3 - "The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy."

Valentine's Day!

We hope you all had a wonderful Valentine's Day...our house was full of Love!

We started the morning off wonderfully by sleeping in til 8:30! ( me and the babies that is :) ) Then we had a fun photo shoot of our rockin outfits provided by Aunt Robin. All was going well until the twins decided to release all of their insides at once! Then, they decided to tag team me by waiting until I was finished changing them to unleash round 2. BOTH BABIES! So by 10:00 am I think I had changed 5 or 6 diapers. We had to bring the A.M. photo shoot to an early close.


I think Caden looks so different in this picture! What an adorable round head :)

My Jenna Girl and her big, beautiful eyes!

The closest thing we will get to a smile from Jenna....mouth still open :)

Jenna says "I'm tired of this, Mom." Caden just looks plain mad.

The carnage of Round 2! Yes, there was a Round 1 before this:

After a good nap and a full tummy, we tried again:

Here they are mesmerized by the Valentine Balloon I brought out.

Then, we had a special surprise....Daddy! Ryan got off work early and came home to spend the afternoon with us. It was so beautiful outside, we packed up and went to Lake Lynn for a walk / run. We had a wonderful time getting fresh air and sunshine! From here, things go downhill. Maybe the twins were too overstimulated? too tired? who knows...but Caden went bonkers first all during our Vday dinner. So our first Valentine's Day dinner with Kids was just that....with kids. Ryan had to hold Caden the whole time to keep him from wailing. I had Jenna in the bouncy seat on the floor bouncing her with my foot. Serious Romance folks. :) haha

After dinner, it was Cadens turn to try Rice Cereal (more about why he is on this in their 4month post). It was an epic disaster. We called it quits halfway through and will try again tomm. After Caden was calmed, Jenna ramped up to new levels we had not experienced before. What is going on babies!? Ryan theorizes there was battery acid in my milk or something!

Anyway, after we fed them their last feeding at 9pm they went out like dreams and didn't wake us up at all the entire night! Whew! In all seriousness, we had a wonderful VDay and wouldn't trade away our new normal for anything! The Valentine Celebration continues for me and Rhino tonight thanks to Gigi and Papa T. So we will get our quiet dinner after all :)

Sleep-over at GiGi's

This past weekend, Ryan went on the High School Ski Trip with our church...that meant I headed over to my parents house to help me with the twins! It had been such a hard week with the twins' colds, I was majorly over-tired from not getting much sleep, so off to GiGi and Papa T's house we went!

So excited to go to GiGi and Papa T's house!

I got to see my precious Snuggle - wuggle!

Caden was feeling back to normal by the weekend and Jenna was alot better, but still not 100%. Check out how we put our inchbug name bands to use...pretty sure inchbug didn't have this in mind :) hehe We got smart about a day into "the sickness" and figured it would be a good idea NOT to cross contaminate the snot-snatchers :) Many thanks to our friend Jenn H for providing these cool snot-snatching name bands :)

Friday night was fun time with Aunt Robin while my parents were gone. It took us a little over 4 hours to watch a movie because we had to stop and pause it so much tending to the twins! haha Saturday was cold and rainy so that meant a lazy day inside! It was soooo nice being at someone else's house because there was actually time to sit down and relax! I'm so thankful for all of our parents...both my parents and Ryan's. They are so helpful to us and have made this transition into parenthood much easier!

On Sunday, in exchange for all of the help my parents gave me this weekend, I agreed to take the twins to their church so they could show them off a bit. :) So many of the people in their Sunday school class had prayed for me and the babies, it was nice to go show them how the twins were doing and thank them for praying for us.Of course, I put the twins in their fancy matching outfits. Caden was extra squirmy so I picked him up to help soothe him down. We had not even reached the opening prayer and he blew it out. All over him, up his back, down his pants, on my dress and yes....all over my hand. We had to change in a little closet bathroom with no baby changer station, I ran out of wipes and Caden kept slipping into the circular trash hole on top of the sink counter top. Hilarious.

Jenna seemed to discover Brad for the first time...she was in love. She just stared and stared with huge big eyes and a gorgeous smile. Watch out Aunt Rob...

We went back to my parents house and rested up until it was time to head to our Superbowl Parties! What a great weekend! Now...its time for me to salvage our house after all the bags were thrown in last night. Laundry, Laundry, Laundry here we come.

Hangin' out with Gigi and Papa T:




Oops dont tell Dad...maybe Gigi and Papa T were delerious from not getting a full nights sleep, but somehow Caden ended up surrounded by pink :)

We had a great time with GiGi, Papa T, Aunt Rob and Uncle Brad...stay tuned for the adorable Valentine Day outfits from Aunt Rob :)

Twins 101 - Sleeping Arrangements

First...I think we have turned the corner and on the road to recovery! Praise the Lord...He sustained us to get through this tough week. We definitely got more sleep when they were newborns...who knew a simple head cold would cause so much chaos in poor little babies!

The next question I get asked all of the time is "do they sleep in the same room?" Answer: YES! Our house is only so big and there was NO WAY I was giving up my guest room...we had someone helping us every night for 5 weeks! There is no way we would have come out of the first month with twins as cordial and sane as we did without our awesome help. We had grandma's, aunts and uncles, great aunts, cousins, and a special guest aunt: CAITLIN!

The second part of that question is: "Do they sleep in the same crib?" Again a big time YES. From the first day they were born, we were encouraged to put them together in their little hospital bin. We actually witnessed them calm down when they were snuggled up to each other! I guess after 9 months of being in a small area bumping into each other and hearing each other's heartbeat, it is quite comforting for them in this crazy, bright, loud world.

I snuggle them up together on pillows for naps and play time. For bedtime, they are in the same crib...they used to be lengthwise but now they are too big and hit and roll all over each other. Now they are width wise on each end of the crib. We will keep them this way until they can roll over then they will go to their own crib. That will be kind of a sad day! I love having them right there together.

At the hospital:

At Home: