Jenna's Surgery

(This is a forever long post, not for the blog scanners out there. But I wanted to document our entire journey to her surgery and give some details incase it can help someone else going through these issues).

 

Rewind to the middle of the night back in August when Ryan was in France for work. We were coming up on a year of "crazy night Jenna" where she would be waking multiple times a night, sometimes multiple times an hour! It all started a month before Easton was born - yep, you read that right - October of 2012! We had gone through everything we could think of trying to parent her through this "stage." I never wrote about it on the blog because things were SO bad at one point, I knew I would just complain and complain and complain on here and be negative nellie. And I reached the point I have only reached like 3 times in my life - utter exhaustion and weakness. I would cry and cry in the mornings after Ryan went to work because I/we had been up ALL night and I knew the long day that awaited. The night before we drove home for Christmas from Ohio (we drove through the night), I told Ryan I would sleep in the guest room and get up with her each time so he would have SOME rest before driving us home to NC all night. I wrote down every time I got up with her:

 

December 14th, 2012

 

7:30p

8:30p

9:50p

10:15p

10:43p

1:29a

1:50a

2:00a

2:24a

4:35a

5:00a

6:09a

 

Oh yea...and I was nursing a newborn in between all of those :) So - not normal, not ok. This was a child who was sleep trained from an early age and slept thru the night for the most part since 9 weeks of age. Over the course of the next year we tried to change bedtime routine, bedtime environment, nightlight, hall light, new pj's, new lovie, different foods, soft music playing, tylenol for teething, Melatonin etc.. Then we chalked it up to our ever changing circumstances moving, new house, new baby brother, new room etc... Then we treated it as a disobedience issue and began stern talks, withdrawing privileges, pops, spankings etc...In a very last ditch effort, we treated it like we were training a 2 month old to sleep. Maybe her sleep cycle was broken and she just needed to learn we were not going to come in at night!? One weekend, me, Ryan and Caden all slept in the basement bedroom for two nights and just let Jenna cry it out.  NOTHING worked. The first few times we would go in at night she wasn't even awake- just crying or moaning. I read up on night terrors but it wasn't quite describing her issues. At times she couldn't tell us her name, our name, or even speak using words. Then other times (mostly after the night went on and on) she would say some random excuse: my leg hurts, I need juice, I need a bandaid etc... We were at a loss. Thank GOD for His very real demonstration of grace to us by allowing Caden to sleep through it all. I mean ALL. Jenna screaming, Jenna crying, Mom and Dad yelling (yep, being real here!) lights on, lights off - you name it. The kid didn't budge. Bless you, sweet boy.

 

It got to the point where she defied logic on how she was continuing to grow and develop and play normally despite the little sleep she was getting a night. Some family members even began to notice dark circles under her eyes. She would have times where she was making the "jenna face"as seen below. Staring off into space, mouth open, tongue out. Just funny looking, but not connected, right?!?

 

 

 

So back to August of this year, Ryan was gone for a week to France and by midweek I was D.O.N.E. I told several friends that having to parent both day and all night is mentally and emotionally overwhelming! God intentionally created the night, it is not an after-affect of anything, for us to rest and a chance to refuel. When you do not have that opportunity then things fall apart quickly. So by midweek of single parenting, I didn't trust myself to stay in control anymore. I went in, whipped Jenna out of bed and put her in bed with me. (something we have NEVER done with our kids. I don't look down on those who do, we just didn't want to start something we couldn't keep up. Remember, we had two out of the gate, so we just never allowed it to be an option. Plus, as noisy as sleeping newborns are, imagine two sleeping babies! I knew I wouldn't sleep a wink.)

 

Before I could walk around the bed to get in on my side, Jenna was fast asleep. What? By the time I got comfortable and ready to drift off to sleep, I heard it. Her breathing stopped. Then it started. Then it started normal again. I got to where I could hear her clearly and noticed it again. Her breathing was so erratic, there as no pattern at all! And when she was breathing rhythmically, she was snoring like a grandpa after Sunday lunch. Sure enough a few minutes of this and she gasped and sat up in bed and began to cry. All at once, the light bulbs went off, the angels started singing, the heavens parted, it all made sense. My baby girl had sleep apnea! I recorded it on my phone so I could let the Doctor hear it. Sure enough at her 3yr well check, I brought it up and the Doctor agreed she needed to see an ENT quickly. Sleep Apnea is not something to play with. Until we met with the ENT, I was still skeptical that this wasn't it. We have tried EVERYTHING and nothing has worked on this girl - it can't be as easy as sleep apnea.

 

She got an appointment to see an ENT, he looked at her tonsils and they looked great! Then one look in her nose and his exact words were "wow, her adenoids are HUGE." My heart sank and rejoiced simultaneously. An explanation! yea, something we can "treat." But an explanation - all those nights of loosing my patience, withholding things from her, spankings, those nights of letting her cry and cry and cry. I could have cried and cried and cried right there. I asked the Doctor if this would be connected with sleep apnea and he said absolutely. There was no way she could breathe - thus the apnea which caused the wakings at night, and thus the mouth open to breathe, eat, and play. He got her in surgery quickly to get it in before Thanksgiving and Holidays.

 

I was not nervous about the surgery itself - we had it easy with just the Adenoids being removed -but I was nervous about my newly 3 year old being put under anesthesia. :( This is her practicing with her mask. She chose strawberry scent. Poor little thing had no idea what was coming!  

 

 

Miss Independent held the Dr's hand and walked right into the OR by herself, holding her Curious George stuffed animal. She didn't even turn around to look at her mama! I can see us dropping her off for College already - won't even turn around to wave bye to us! I had not even finished my coffee by the time he came out to tell us it was over and she was doing great. He confirmed the adenoids needed to come out and we would be able to tell a big difference after healing had taken place.

 

I was not prepared for Jenna post surgery. We walked back to her recovery bed to her SCREAMING. She was so confused from the anesthesia, she wanted someone to hold her, but then would push away and try to get out. She didn't want her IV's in and wanted them out of her arm. It was sooooo hard to watch. Just didn't prepare myself for that part!We got her home where she remained confused for a while, slept on and off and just felt miserable. The tube scratched her throat so she didn't want to eat or drink anything well which resulted in a fever from dehydration. She also wouldn't swallow the first day so she walked around with saliva pooling out of her mouth. We started carrying around a container for her to "spit up" in. Oh Jenna!  The gunk that had to drain out was stomach turning gross and her breath? As my sister would say - "her breath be kickin." But by day 5, I would say we were mostly back to normal. 

The only way I could get her asleep the first day was to sleep beside her and hold her hand. Sign me up!

 

Caden stayed with Ryan's parents for a few days so we could concentrate on Jenna and her needs. When he came home, she perked right up -ready to play. Precious stuff. Exactly one week after surgery, she slept through the night - all night! First time in a loooong time that had happened. Then she took a 2.5hr nap the next day. Then she slept all night again followed by another 2.5hr nap. This has been the result of her surgery. The girl can breathe so she sleeps SO WELL now. She is no Caden - every once in awhile she wakes up needing something at night, but overall the difference is night and day. She doesn't play, eat or sit with her mouth wide open anymore. I'm so thankful the Lord brought us through that tough stage of parenting and allowed us the opportunity to find a cause and help her. Truly His mercies on display.

 

So that is our journey with Jenna the past year. Glad to have that part of the chapter closed :) I thought we were passed the point of it being a "stage" and somehow we had a kid who just wouldn't sleep anymore - for the rest of our lives! Thankfully, His mercies are new every morning and got us through a restless year. So, if your in a "stage" that you feel has graduated to "forever" - it's not, I promise! In a day or two, a week, a month, maybe a few years but for sure when God comes to take us Home - it will be over! Hope your encouraged, I am having learned this lesson. :)